Updated: Aug 25
When does Our Journey start? The day we are born?
We all have many journeys or rather Seasons during the course of our lives and in the end the Journey we have been on, makes us who we are.
My current Journey was brought on my many events / incidents / circumstances – the biggest and most traumatic was losing my life partner and soulmate, Chris, on 1 April 2020.
My entire life was shattered, I was lost without him. I have always been a strong person and have been through plenty challenging times in my life, but nothing could have prepared me for that. I started having panic attacks, one after the other, hardly slept three hours a night and became completely depressed.
What didn’t help the situation I found myself in was that it was right in the beginning of COVID hard lock-down. I could not see friends, could not hug and grieve and do all the normal things people do in these situations. Many whom I considered friends and or family suddenly turned their backs on me, or simply disappeared from my life. It was tearing me apart.
Finally, I knew something had to change, I needed to pull myself out of this deep dark hole I was busy falling into. I made a drastic decision to seek help and made my way to Johannesburg to go see a very special Clinical Psychologist who specializes in Hypno Therapy. He helped me to work through previous traumas in my life and finally the loss of Chris and everything that went together with that.
Through it all there were some very special people who supported and stood by me, never judging, always kind, always supportive, always caring, always there – understanding that it was a process. They supported me through the sadness, depression, anger, disappointments and hurt, until finally the healing started and now continues.
They are all still here and I am forever thankful to these special humans.
During this process, the realization slowly came to me that
Life is too short not to live it the way I have always wanted to live it!
It was inevitable and finally I made the decision to enroll in a FGASA course to hopefully put me onto the path I would like to be.
Soon after my resignation from my current profession followed...
Madness at the age of forty-five right!?
I also thought so for a while, but once the course got under way in January 2020, I was quickly consumed and excited - I had purpose again, I had something to wake-up for again!
I have loved Nature for as long as I can remember, I have always wanted to be a Ranger. For the first time in my life, there is absolutely no reason why I can’t follow my passion and so… It is happening, my new Journey has started!
Here I am sitting in Hoedspruit, only one day away from reporting to campus for six months to complete the practical side of my course. Eeeek!
This step has been such a huge positive in my life, I look forward to sharing my struggles, my achievements and overcoming of fears with you - this journey - on an ongoing basis.
I am in my happiest place of all, The Bush! I could not have done this without the support of my loyal and amasing friends and family – THANK YOU to each and every one of you, you have made a difference!